I’m dead to living a lie

Being on standby

Watching my dreams drive by

So you can fly


I’m dead to being less of me

Giving my best to thee

Because I chose not to be

What I know to be


I’m dead to skirting my words

Easing your burden

Forgetting I’m flirtin’

With Kamikaze’s sword


Your words won’t frame

For they don’t contain

My real me

Seeping out from my enemy


I refuse that part

Of this destructive story

That seeks to make me a victim

And a martyr


Dead is lifeless

Dead is hopeless

No use in speaking with a dummy

I just don’t have the tummy


No light in sight

No song to be sung

Here we end

At the Reaper’s bend


I’m looking at you

You’re looking at me

Without words spoken

With nothing exchanged



Without anything due

The only echo heard is the scripture read

‘Let the dead bury the dead’

© Cecilia Myles 2019



Your eyes tell me more than your words can say




My heart feels the pain of yours



My eyes are awakening in the dark




My mind shifts to where you are


Looking into your eyes

I saw the pain

Seeing the depth of the well

I knew far too well


Setting my will to think

You will not sink

For you I will not lose

You are not alone


I have looked

Into your eyes

And saw your truth

(c) Cecilia Myles

So I do not enjoy drudgery.  If I could avoid it I would yet it keeps popping up!I am a “jump in with both feet” kind of person. I am ‘Go hard or go home’ and this reflects in a personality of extremes and bursts of energy. And so when it’s time to manage drudgery, I use the burst of energy in the hopes of suppressing the parts I do not quite enjoy. And this forceful-and-hands-on-deck-with-both-feet-in-and-much-too-much-to-say-while-doing-it-approach is disastrous! It causes great imbalance during execution and deep exasperation. Where I would rather discard the experience and complain, growth and progress actually occurs when I stop trying to move beyond it and stop complaining. 

Like sludge on a shoe, drudgery is not meant to be wiped away swiftly. It is a purifying and clarifying experience. It’s not about enjoyment, it is a matter of production. When I stop struggling with its existence, my actions to stop it begins to affect my experience in that the pressure of it lightens. When the pressure lessens, I become attracted to more positive experiences around me and shift from complaining. For all of the frustration I could spend on the experience, through the shift, I uncover provocation and motivation.

Drudgery being dull and menial work is counter-stimulating when handled improperly. It can seem to actually reduce the probability of what is hoped for. When handled wisely, it can become the immediate catalyst for what I’ve been hoping and praying for. For the one who works with hope in mind and faith engaged, the drudgery does not hinder; it becomes a sign of what is hoped for. 

Drudgery is so routine that it doesn’t take constant thinking and worrying to complete, it just requires constancy. So it doesn’t require all of your energy, just your diligence. You may not enjoy reading the bible daily, but the constancy of reading it still holds a return with the least amount of effort. Because there is a secret in the diligence, each action to read is creating momentum. With belief that it is the word of God (2 Timothy 3:16) and it is spirit and life (John 6:63), reading every day plants spirit and life that grows into something more. A moment a day can one day make the difference in a year that intense effort could’ve burnt out.

Like food being cooked in a slow cooker creates tender, succulent meat, let the drudgery that occurs occasionally to benefit and not harm you. The habit of daily dental hygiene doesn’t require a lot to accomplish yet if done twice a day properly, the dentist will usually provide a good report every six months. I can’t ever say that I thought brushing my teeth was a joyful highlight of my day yet neither was it a painful experience, it is necessary and thus useful.

Get out of your own way and accept the way you must take, all is not needed for every task of your life yet constancy is always a necessary component of the recipe. #constancyiskey #allisnotneeded




I have looked at my blog several times over the past couple of months, asking myself why haven’t I added a new post. So much advice warns to not take an absence and be sure to set a routine. Many warnings sometimes will not prevent the inevitable! As a blogger, the basic advice is to focus on the audience and ensure constant engagement with your audience.I totally agree with this advice.

I also believe motive is essential for everything. My motive for this blog is for my enjoyment and for connection. The first is because it causes me joy, that is first and primary for me. The secondary is connection. Being part of a larger context does return to me satisfaction that I am not completely removed from the outside world of communication. I hope that I can encourage someone in their journey of life. Yet if the connection does not produce the outcome I hope for, the definite outcome I wanted above the connection has occurred – I have experienced joy in my expression.

Absence can be framed by others and institutions as indicative of personal ethic and value toward particular entities. You will not get a perfect attendance award from school if you were out sick for any reason, who cares that you were SICK?! No show, no reward! This is hilarious because jobs will terminate you and you will look others prominent positions for life occurrences that cause absence. I don’t see this as not being fair, this is life. I wholeheartedly believe that your life is what you make of it. I refuse to accept someone else’s point of view just because they believe in their perspective as much as I believe in mine. So I tend to believe that absence has a renewing benefit and what is loss from someone else’s hand is far better to lose than this renewing benefit that I receive from God.

The value of absence that I have learned that it affords me is objectivity and perspective. During this absence, I have assessed why I blog and why I’m a minister, life coach, and speaker. Assessing where I am and where I am going, what I have done and what I still need to do would not have been possible unless I was absent. My absence did not  determine my doom, it actually helped me ensure my success. When Jesus didn’t prevent Lazarus death, though he cried at Lazarus’ passing, he expressed the reward of intentional absence. John 11:14-15 ESV, “Then Jesus told them plainly, ‘Lazarus has died, and for your sake I am glad that I was not there, so that you may believe. But let us go to him.” Jesus intentional absence gave time for one of the greatest miracles of the Bible, it demonstrated that no matter the depth of death, Jesus had the power to give life back. Jesus stayed away long enough for the customs of that day to be defied in having a hand in Lazarus’ resurrection. His absence substantiated the might and love of God toward his people that they may know that God was a God of redemption, not just of eternity, culture, race, or finance but physical life itself.

Could absence actually produce something far greater than the fear supposed? Fear distorts purpose and it is imperative that we learn how to discern purpose in our actions and motives for the direction that we choose to take. God intended for this absence to produce an ordained outcome that opened my eyes to greater possibilities. My prayer for you is that you discover purpose for your absences that you may embrace greater living and possibilities as well.

Grateful for every absence, Ceci